Everywhere . . . . man

I was thinking today about much complaining I do (internally - I generally try to restrain it), and I was like, "Dang! You're like a dang copperhead snake." My mom always used to talk about "biting people's heads off." I was also thinking about this idea she always shared about hitting tennis balls back across the net, in reference to conversation. The implied suggestion is about returning the comment back so that conversation can happen. (Another one of my weaknesses.) I was thinking on that this week, "Hit the ball back over. Keep the conversation alive." I feel so grumpy lately, a lot of my conversations have not been getting hit back across the net . . .

The lyrics to Everywhere (Johnny Cash - I've been everywhere, man . . etc. and all the list of places) are not nearly as cool written down as they are hearing them for the first time. But still pretty cool.

I have been enjoying a couple of Tom Petty songs this week: "The Waiting" (below) and "I Won't Back Down." The Waiting, for the way that long, drawn-out"waaaahaay-teeng" sounds, for the twang of the sad guitar, for the uplifting message, and because it deals with romantic love, which I'm very interested in right now. My favorite part is "never as good as I feel right now Baby you're the only one that's ever known how To make me wanna live like I wanna live now." Wow, that's cool! That's a man who is happy and determined, who's very ecstatic about his new loving situation.

Then I was running this week, and often a song will pop in my head that expresses my mood - sort of like the way that I talk to myself. At this moment, I was gritting my teeth in satisfied happiness in spite of pain, and what came to my mind was "No, I won't back down. No, I won't back down. You can stand me up at the gates of hell, but I won't back down." Once again, awesome as heck, and I believe his voice.

So, all in all, I'm seeing my weaknesses more clearly than ever, but I'm still just ecstatic with giddiness, because I'm like, "Who cares?" When I'm feeling this good, it's making me want to live like I want to live now. And I will have to say that the waaaaating is the sweetest part. The story's getting good, the cooking is getting right, and I am excited for the fireworks to start. Lot to work still to go, but hey, the dreaming is good.

I love the way stuff gets "recast" in your life. You hear a meaningless song, meant nothing to you at the time other than a groovy rhythm, it goes through an internal channel, and eventually comes out in a meaningful way. And the unbelievable (!) intuitive. Your mind knows what you need in a way you can't even comprehend and sends something down like a voice from above.

"The Waiting" by Tom Petty
"Oh baby don't it feel like heaven right now Don't it feel like somethin' from a dream Yeah I've never known nothing quite like this Don't it feel like tonight might never be again We know better than to try and pretend Baby no one could have ever told me 'bout this The waiting is the hardest part Every day you see one more card You take it on faith, you take it to the heart The waiting is the hardest part Well Yeah I might have chased a couple of women around All it ever got me was down Then there were those that made me feel good But never as good as I feel right now Baby you're the only one that's ever known how To make me wanna live like I wanna live now."